thursday, august 1st
why i like america
why i like america
1. when you buy stuff from any grocery store, you can put it all in a brown paper bag. i love how brown paper bags feel.
2. k-mart and wal-mart are huge warehouses with no horizons posing as shops. they stock eight million types of everything. i got hello kitty panties at k-mart once.
3. you can always count on a free refill
4. delias. nuff said.
5. the chicken caeser salads are big and yummy enough to keep you full all day, and only cost five bucks.
6. psychic hotlines are advertised on teevee.
7. the scary benjamin franklin bridge in philadelphia, where you can walk above a baseball stadium and end up right by a super-cool aquarium.
8. an american once called me "bro"
9. americans love talking about, singing about and looking at asses. they have a huge number of words for ass; my favourite being "booty" because it fills my imagination with a trunk full of glittering pirate treasure.
10. you can have a corn dog and a cola flavoured drink for breakfast at k-mart and no-one questions you or thinks you're being gross. i know this because i've done it before myself.
11. california knows how to party.
12. the mall...and endless expanse of frivoulous stuff and angry groups of teens.
13. you can get a years worth of seventeen magazine for a mere $12.
14. people on buses and trains are always very loud. you can listen in on their stories of gossip, scandal and mystery on the way to wherever you're going. it's better than a walkman.
15. some commercials on teevee go on for about twenty minutes. it's difficult not to want whatever they're selling after that amount of time. i remember really wanting a nail stencil kit once, like really badly.
16. the radical cheerleaders are straight up american feminist sass.
17. i was once in a shop in jersey when some man came in and started freestyling about how kids shouldn't have guns. political hip hop in a shop! i liked it.
18. bust magazine
19. the post-boxes look sorta like bins.
20. i have met the best people there.
suds at